Creamed In The Butt By My Handsome Living Corn.

Today’s WHATTHEFUCK. Amazon is filled with all sorts of self-published works of fiction, how-to, self-help and other random pieces of writing that defy description. Anyone can publish their own eBooks and this has lead us to a place where every fetish imaginable has been exhausted and we’re now into the unimaginable.

This being us to… Creamed In The Butt By My Handsome Living Corn. A book that… well, it’s about a farmer named Matthew McConneymay who meets Lipton, a… man-sized ear of corn who’s funny and charming and headed to the same agricultural conference as our protagonist… you know how these things go… boy meets vegetable and things heat up.

One of the more touching moments is how Matthew is taken with the corn’s beautiful yellow kerneled skin.

It’s also rather telling that even though Matthew is willing to date pretty much anything, but he still manages to find one that looks like himself.

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